Boxed and Packaged

Last month during my influenza 5-day quarantine, I drove myself crazy with too much time to think.  As I packed my giant rolling duffel bags with winter jackets and snowboard pants to bring home, I thought too much...which is really hard to do when you have the flu.  But I did.


This is what I thought:
I'm moving back to America in 2.5 months.  That's not much time.  
I have no job and no plan.
This is when I'm supposed to pursue my dream.
What's my dream? Do I even have a dream? 
What am I passionate about? 
Writing...fantastic.  That'll get me places.
Helping people.  Another good one.
Writing and people.  And Jesus.  
How does that fit into a career? 
Why don't my dreams and passions have job titles like "wedding planner"?
Why don't my dreams and passions have degree names like "Masters of Family Therapy"?
Why can't I have dreams and passions that are nicely packaged? 


A very dear friend of mine listened to my rant, and then lovingly reminded me that I am an odd-shaped package to start with and I shouldn't expect my dreams and passions to be nicely packaged.


I thought about this because Wednesday I received a very odd-shaped package in a bubble-wrap envelope.  Thursday I received two rectangular cardboard boxes from Amazon.  


I'm coming to grips with my awkwardly packaged dreams and passions.  How boring would the world be if our gifts all came in nicely packaged Amazon boxes.  Regardless of whether everything could fit in an envelope that looks like it'll burst or sits in a nicely packed Amazon box, it should all be to the glory of God.  Whether it's hand delivered to your neighbor or shipped to the far reaches of the earth, it's loving people the way God has individually called us to love to the glory of God.  I got so caught up in trying to figure out WHAT it was that I forgot WHY I had it.  God gave me a passion for writing and helping people and I wanted to know WHAT to do with it instead of remembering WHY I had it in the first place--to give God the glory.


"Our perspective on life is tragically godless.  We miss the one thing worth seeing, the glory of the ever-present God.  When this happens, our lives are not built on the foundation of God's glory, which was intended to give our lives a starting point and a destination, a reason to get up and the strength to go on.  Every aspect of my existence was meant to be filled with the glory of God.  Everything I think, ever decision I make, every word I speak was meant to be shaped by a humble acknowledgment of his claim on my life.  I was created to live for his glory." Paul David Tripp (Instruments in the Redeemer's Hand - 98)