Hear Us From Heaven

I couldn't help but sing this song as I was driving home from dinner tonight. I went to visit a friend in a neighboring village. She had invited me over for dinner at her house. I didn't really want to go to be honest. I was in the zone and super focused on studying Japanese. But I said I would go. So I went. I didn't really want to go. I asked a sister to pray for me before I left. I just listened to worship music as I drove. We were eating dinner and talking, mostly about work, but then things shifted. We started talking about God and Jesus and Christianity. I was not prepared for that. And as we were talking and she was asking questions, "Hear Us From Heaven" came to mind. Especially, "Breathe life into these dry and thirsty souls". I could tell she had so many questions and just unknowns. But my inadequate Japanese proved to be a barrier, so I told her next time I would bring my Japanese Bible and she was quite excited.

Keep praying for Japan! Keep praying for my people! Lord, hear us from heaven! Come heal this land! Breathe life into these dry and thirsty souls! Open the blind eyes! Unlock the deaf ears! Touch this generation!

Lord, hear our cry

Come heal our land

Breath life into these dry and thirsty souls

Lord, hear our prayer

Forgive our sin

And as we call on your name

Would you make this a place

For your glory to dwell

Chorus:

Open the blind eyes

Unlock the deaf ears

Come to your people

As we draw near

Hear us from heaven

Touch our generation

We are your people

Crying out in desperation

Bridge:

Hear us from heaven,

Hear us from heaven,

Hear us from heaven (4x)

"Hear Us From Heaven" -- Jared Anderson

Kabocha Pumpkin Pie

I love pumpkin pie. I once got paid with pumpkin pie for tutoring. I love it that much.

Today, we made "pumpkin" pie at school. It was pumpkin pie made out of...kabocha. It's this green Japanese pumpkin. I thought it couldn't be that bad. It looked the same when the students were pouring the batter into the pie dish. We watched it bake in the oven. We pulled it out and it smelled good...but it didn't smell like pumpkin pie. It didn't really look like pumpkin pie either. And it definitely didn't taste like pumpkin pie. Don't get me wrong--it tasted really good. It just didn't taste like pumpkin pie.

But the students were so excited about it. They said it tasted amazing. They happily sat at the table and ate their "pumpkin" pie with big grins on their faces.

I think some people (myself included) have settled for kabocha pumpkin pies of life, not the real-deal-nutmeg-cinnamon-melt-in-your-mouth pumpkin pie. But we don't know any better. We happily take our kabocha pumpkin pies of life and tell everyone that it tastes amazing. And we're excited. But to someone who has had REAL pumpkin pie knows that those kabocha pumpkin pie people are missing out on something amazing. That they don't really know what pumpkin pie is. They don't know what pumpkin pie really tastes like. They don't know how AMAZING pumpkin pie can be. Because once you've had a taste of the real-deal-nutmeg-cinnamon-melt-in-your-mouth pumpkin pie, why would you ever eat a kabocha pumpkin pie?

The real-deal-nutmeg-cinnamon-melt-in-your-mouth pumpkin pie is the life that God has always wanted you to live. The real deal. Once you've experienced it, you can't go back to the kabocha pumpkin pies of the world. It's a mind-boggling, life-changing experience when you meet God. It's like eating kabocha pumpkin pies and then finally eating one of Grandma's homemade pumpkin pies with a little dollop of whipped cream on top. That's a total underestimate of how great God is, but you get the point. You can't go back. If you've really tasted and savored and enjoyed the real pumpkin pie, why would you go back? Why? When Jesus Christ has changed your life and you've tasted the goodness of God's grace, why would you go back to the life you lived?

"Taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!" Psalm 34:8

Raining Slushees

It wasn't quite rain. It wasn't quite hail/snow. I pulled back the curtain to see slushee being spat on my house from the night sky. It was quite interesting. I would've sat there longer, but it was quite chilly.

It is definitely getting cold. I bought a neck warmer this weekend, and it was definitely worth all 650yen that I paid for it. It was warmer in the grocery store than it was in my car last night.

I've heard that it was the hottest summer and the earliest winter this year. Last year, it didn't snow til late December (according to a friend). So it's unusual. But it's cold. However, I just got my sub-zero sleeping bag yesterday! Praise the Lord!

It snowed in Sapporo yesterday. It wasn't cold enough here to snow, just slushee. But it looks like maybe Thursday? I'll definitely be posting pictures when that happens!

3 Months

Today marks 3 months since I left good ol' smoggy LA for Siberia. I can't really believe it's been that long since I've had Mexican food, hung out at a park with friends, had a spontaneous adventure, built a beach bonfire, and then had a slightly sketchy adventure. Well, we fixed that tonight.

I drove down to the guys' place. We had planned this a week ago. We were going to celebrate having a free weekend to relax, enjoy Mexican food, and celebrate surviving 3 months in Japan. We had some epic taco-burritos. They weren't quite tacos...and they weren't quite burritos. But they tasted fantastic. Had I eaten the same burrito in South Central it'd probably be the worst Mexican food I've ever eaten. But, boy, did it taste amazing after 3 months! We ate and were dying on the floor for a while. We headed to the school next door and decided to play ultimate frisbee. It was fun and it got pretty competitive. Until we almost saw our taco-burritos for a second time. So we went back and ate more food and just talked for a while. We decided we needed another adventure. I wanted to go to the beach earlier in the day because it was beautiful outside, but we ended up going to the beach at night. We built a bonfire. No idea if that's legal or not, but we did it and it was pretty cool. We just walked along the beach looking for wood and then just sat in silence and watched it. The almost-full moon was out and shining on the ocean and I could just imagine LA on the other side of the horizon. We went to eat ramen and then got invited to someone's house...so we went. Shady but there were 4 of us and we all made it back alive. It was an adventurous day, and a lovely way to celebrate my 3 months. Otherwise, I probably would've sulked at home that I wasn't at Pismo with my sorority sisters and just did nothing all day.

I was trying to think of something I've learned in the last 3 months. I've learned plenty, but it's hard to put it into words. When I first got here, I began to understand God as my Comforter. Slowly, He became my Best Friend. In recent days, He has become my Provider. Being alone with God has allowed me to see and seek parts of His character I don't think I've ever earnestly desired. I've always wanted to know God the giver of good gifts and blessings. I've always wanted to know God the magic eight ball. But I'm getting to know Him as my Redeemer--from my past, my present and my future. I'm getting to know Him as my Lover--from sunsets to autumn season to pretty clouds. I'm getting to know Him as my Jesus--a personal Jesus.

3 months before I came to Japan, I was anxious about my placement, what schools I'd be teaching at, how big my town would be, what work would be like, etc. 3 months after getting here, I realize that God took care of everything. He provided me with super caring coworkers who take care of me. He provided a church so I could still be physically connected to the body of Christ. He provided a Skype Bible study so I could continue to fellowship with other believers. He provided internet connection so I could still be back at home. But most of all, He provided me with Himself. The longer I've been here the more I realize how much I need Jesus every single day. And I am thankful that I can need Him. I am thankful that He meets me everyday where I'm at. And sometimes that's not a very good place, but still He meets me there. I can trust my Jesus to never leave, to always provide, and to constantly love.

I need You, Jesus

Come to my rescue

Where else can I go?

There's no other name by which I am saved

Capture me with grace

I will follow you

"Rescue" - Newsong

We're in the books!

My tiny village made it on the map!

Yesterday, my tiny village had the LOWEST temperature in all of Japan! We were at -5C when I woke up. I knew it was cold. But I didn't expect it to be that cold. I opened my front door to find my bike seat covered in ice. The windshield of my work car was covered in ice. I didn't really know what to do. I sat in my icebox car and attempted to heat my engine and defrost my window. It was too cold to even hold the steering wheel. I have to drive with my gloves on!

But it warmed up and proved to be a gorgeous day! I took this while driving...probably a bad idea, but I just couldn't pass up the open road and awesome clouds!

I took this one on my drive back to the office from a school. The sun starts setting around 4:30, so it's right when I'm heading back to the office. Which means I can catch some pretty fantastic looking sunsets!

I made my first purchase from Amazon Japan. I bought myself a sub-zero sleeping bag! I have my heater on before I go to sleep and then it's set to turn on at 5:30, so it's bearable when I actually need to get out of bed at 6. I've been going to sleep around 9 but waking up at 4 because it's so cold in my room. So hopefully, it'll help me sleep better...and longer. Can't wait til that gets here!

Freezing deer school festival coffee shop toothpaste

1) It is cold. I checked the weather for tonight/tomorrow morning when I wake up. 3. 3 degrees. It is OCTOBER! Whatever. I'll get used to it...or start sleeping next to the heater.

2) They always tell me to watch out for deer when I'm driving. Friday night, I saw a bunch of deer while riding the bus. I finally figured out what they were talking about. And then last night, it was super foggy driving back from town and I ALMOST HIT A DEER! Someone already hit it, but it was like just over the crest of a hill. So I came over the hill and swerved to miss it. I don't think my car would've taken that very well. It was a close call. I am now super paranoid about driving at night.

3) I sang at a school festival today (yay for waking up at 5:30 to watch the game and then go straight to work). And I have another one on Saturday. On Saturday I'm in the drama, playing the piano, and attempting the conga. It's going to be interesting. I don't even know how to describe these school festivals. I'd say they're like Homecoming...but they're really not. Uniquely Japanese...let's just put it that way.

4) Last night I went to town and hung out at a coffee shop with another female JET. It was so nice just to hang out with someone...especially another female! We just drank fancy coffee and laughed and talked about work and the adorable small children that kept running around. It was nice to just have...a physical human being in front of me. And she hugged me. It was just what I needed after a crazy week.

5) I found Aquafresh. It'll do the job. I'm running out of toothpaste and everyone says I packed 2 tubes, but I can't find the other one. I probably traded it for like Cheetos or something on the airplane. But I found Aquafresh in town, so that'll keep my teeth from decaying...hopefully.

I am exhausted. It's time to recuperate before another crazy week!

Lord Jesus, You are so good. Even when I can't go to church, You bless me with majestic scenery and perfect weather to sit outside and just do some Bible study in my car before having to face another day of work. You protect me from crazy deer and have made this week absolutely amazing despite everything that's going on. You are so good. Thank You for so many undeserved blessings...and giving me exactly what I need even when I don't think I need it. Thank You for always loving me more than I can even imagine.

Incomplete Thought

So I finally went back and reread my last post. It was an incomplete thought. I also wrote it over the span of 3 hours and took a bike ride in the middle of writing...that could explain things.

I am in a different season of life (duh). I'm done getting edumacated (for now) and I finally have a salaried job...a job that's totally different than what I studied. That's a big change in and of itself. Now put me in another country. It would've been okay had I lived somewhere like LA...or even just a city...or a suburb...or with people. But alas, I am in a foreign country in the middle of nowhere. That's a BIG change. And I wish this foreign country was like England where they just speak funny English. But I'm teaching English because no one speaks English. That's a HUGE change. I went from LA summer to Hokkaido winter via a 10-hour plane ride and 5+ hour train ride.

The change of seasons is exciting. I know that deep down this is where my heart has longed to be. My heart's desire was to be in Japan. I don't know about middle-of-nowhere, freezing-your-pants-off Japan, but I am in Japan and that alone has made my heart giddy. I get to explore the idea of a career change and get me feet wet in the teaching field--that is exciting.

But I am also glad that this is only a season. That this will eventually end and another season will come. I am thankful that the time alone is only for a season. I thank God for the season I was blessed with during college when I was physically surrounded by Christian fellowship. I thank God now for this season I have to enjoy Him and to learn how to trust and rely on Him for everything.

Being alone has made me crave fellowship. I crave Christian fellowship more than an enchilada-style sweet pork barbacoa burrito from Cafe Rio. I crave it. My soul longs to be in fellowship with other believers. I have a church here but the language barrier makes deep fellowship difficult. I have Skype dates but the time difference makes connecting somewhat difficult. I cried to God. I cried in frustration and just feeling alone and isolated. I cried and He heard me. I have a Skype Bible Study every Wednesday night with other Christians on my island. While we can't see each other and may never meet face-to-face, we have a weekly meeting to just get into the Word of God with each other and to fellowship together. This is a new season of fellowship.

My God doesn't go back on His promises. He promised to provide...and He did. He provided me with internet connection. He provided me with a computer. He provided me with Christians on this crazy gigantic island who desire to know Him more and more. He provided me with people back home who are dedicated to waking up early and setting aside time to check in. He provided more than I asked. He provided exactly what my heart needed.

In this season I will give thanks to my God, my Provider, for never leaving, never changing, and always loving.

You are good and Your love endures forever.

Seasons

So when I was thinking about writing this blog post, the first song that came to mind was "Days of Love" by Wes Terasaki. All you growing up at PVBC Family Retreats know the song. I'm not sure why that song came to mind because it doesn't even have the word "season" in it. Regardless, it was stuck in my head as I was driving/biking/walking around taking pictures.

I don't think I ever really understood the concept of seasons. Growing up in SoCal, we don't really have seasons other than basketball season and baseball season and football season. Palm trees don't really change color and there's always enough sunshine to go to the beach in December. Fruit and veggies are almost always of abundance and bananas are always readily available at Ralph's.

I knew about different "seasons" of life...but I don't think I understood what that meant. Seasons never really seemed much different. My Junior High became my High School. I went to College with my brother and my mom worked down the street and so did my dad. Home was never too far. While the transition from high school to college was a big change, it was like LA fall to LA winter. It gets darker earlier and it drops maybe 10 degrees, but that's really about it. Sometimes I didn't even notice the seasons changing in LA, and I think I went through much of my time at SC not knowing things were changing. Hindsight is always 20/20, and looking back, I can tell that, yeah, lots of things changed, and I went through a lot of different "LA seasons".

But I'm beginning to understand seasons a little bit better. Seasons look different, they feel different, and everything around you changes. I wear my thermals and long johns everyday. I started to turn my heater on when I wake up. I basically live in one room in my house because that's where the heater is. I have to wear gloves to ride my bike to work. It feels different. It's colder. The trees are changing colors. I was told that only the "trees with hands will become red like fire," which I found lining the street on my way to work. Soon that whole street will (hopefully) become "red like fire" and I'll take another picture.

King Solomon wrote about seasons in Ecclesiastes 3. "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven." And I think now I'm beginning to realize that seasons don't last forever. Unlike LA where we have the never-ending-season-of-awesome-weather-and-sunshine-forever, I know it'll get cold and snow will come and then it'll become spring and the snow will melt and flowers will bloom again. And that in life, it will get cold and snow will come and there will be days when I wonder if the snow will ever melt and if the flowers will ever bloom again.

Sometimes we know that seasons will change, and sometimes they just happen. I know winter will come and snow will fall, and I'm excited to see snow fall. While it's scary to think about how cold it can get here, I'm excited to experience something new, something different. My sentiments about winter are the same when I prayed about coming here. It's scary to be an ocean away from almost everyone I love. It's scary to be alone in a foreign country. But it's exciting to be here. It's exciting to be with God and experience Him. To be able to meet God in a new way is priceless. And it's only for a season. Trees will change colors and snow will fall. Snow will melt and flowers will bloom.

May the Lord go with you as you go away from here

May the light of Jesus light your way

May His Word surround you in an unfamiliar land

Filling your days with love

May His Spirit touch your heart and carry you along

Going where our prayers have gone before

Not a worry, not a car, for trust is day by day

These are the days of love

Yesterday's passing away

But these are the days of the Lord

And the grace of Jesus that has brought you safe this far

Shall again go with you on your way

On other days just like today, but different better by far

Yes, these are the days of love

Emo

Let's be honest, there are more palm trees where I live in LA than trees that actually change colors when the temperature drops in October. I've never seen a tree look like this before. I was driving home from church today and I just smiled and laughed. It was so beautiful and taking a picture wouldn't do that kind of beauty any justice. It was like looking into a giant barrel of Fuji apples...and then going slightly cross-eyed until the colors all blend together. That's what things look like right now...and it's absolutely amazing.

So I was being a bit emo this week. Maybe it's the weather. Maybe it was just an exhausting week. But back in LA when I got emo, I would go to the cliffs and/or write poetry. That was how I learned to healthily handle emoness. But I have no cliffs here and I hadn't written poetry in six weeks. But there was one place I have found to be a quiet refuge. So I jumped in the car with my Bible and journal and poetry journal and set out for my quiet refuge in hope of finding the sunset and Jesus.

I got here. It was cloudy...and frigid. And there were other people. Needless to say, I was a tad disappointed. As I climbed up the hill, the people slowly started to leave. By the time I got to the top, I was alone. But there was no sunset. It was hidden behind the clouds and the volcano. And I stood there and almost cried. All I wanted was a sunset. I opened my poetry journal and, for the first time since I came to Japan, wrote a poem that I could feel. I stood there and waited for the sunset that never came. I opened my Bible and starting reading out loud (since I was alone).

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?...You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?...In God, whose word I praise, in the Lord, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me? I must perform my vows to you, O God; I will render thank offerings to you. For you have delivered my soul from death, yes, my feet from falling, that I may walk before God in the light of life. Psalm 56:3-4, 8, 10-13

Be merciful to me, O God, be merciful to me, for in you my soul takes refuge; in the shadow of your wings I will take refuge, till the storms of destruction pass by. I cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills his purpose for me...My heart is steadfast, O God, my heart is steadfast! I will sing and make melody! Awake, my glory! Awake, O harp and lyre! I will awake the dawn! I will give thanks to you, O Lord, among the peoples; I will sing praises to you among the nations. For your steadfast love is great to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds. Be exalted, O God, above the heavens! Let your glory be over all the earth! Psalm 57:1-2, 7-11

Thus says God, the Lord, who created the heavens and stretched them out, who spread out the earth and what comes from it, who gives breath to the people on it and spirit to those who walk in it: "I am the Lord; I have called you in righteousness; I will take you by the hand and keep you; I will give you as a covenant for the people, a light for the nations, to open the eyes that are blind, to bring out the prisoners from the dungeon, from the prison those who sit in darkness. I am the Lord; that is my name; my glory I give to no other, nor my praise to carved idols. Behold, the former things have come to pass, and new things I now declare; before they spring forth I tell you of them." Isaiah 42:5-9

Needless to say I climbed down the hill a little more humble and much more comforted than when I had climbed up the hill. I will continue to cling the promises of my God because He never changes. He never goes back on His promises. He can't love me any more than He does right now.

To my Littles

This is dedicated to my Littles--guns and ica (don't hate me, this is the only picture I have of the 3 of us):

I love meat. My littles love meat. My littles and I love meat together. I'm almost certain that every single Korean BBQ restaurant I went to in the past year was with one of them. My littles also know I like random adventures and trying new things (e.g. chocolate bacon). So, yes, this post is dedicated to the two of you.

After church I stopped at Homac (the "Home Ammenity Center") to pick up a jar. That was all I was going to buy. I came out with much more than I intended. As I perused the aisles for a jar to hold my coffee grounds, I stumbled upon pots and pans and other funny Japanese cookingware. And then I saw it...

It's a personal size Korean BBQ grill. It was the last one at the store and fairly cheap. I decided it was a good investment and it would give me something to play with once I got home. Let the adventures begin!

I threw on some fresh zucchini, garlic, onions, green bell peppers, and MEAT! It was fantastic! It was a little scary setting the thing up though. That flame is a tea candle sized wad of flammable blue stuff that smells like toothpaste. The first one was fine and good. I had the top off, dropped the thing in the bottom bowl, lit the flammable toothpaste, and then put the top back on. But halfway through my dinner, it died. I needed to put a new one in there. These flammable toothpaste things don't have nice little wicks like tea candles. The whole thing just erupts in a giant flame. And I couldn't take the top off because there was food on it and it was crazy hot. I set it on the metal kitchen countertop, lit the toothpaste, used tongs and shoved it into the mouth of the BBQ. So it proved to be a little nerve-wracking but successful and overall delicious. I probably should've opened a window (or not because it's freezing) or at least turned the vent on because my house was a little smoky after I had finished eating. But it was totally worth it.

I realized while I was eating that Korean BBQ was not made to be eaten alone. Korean BBQ involves fellowship. You never see a person at a Korean BBQ place alone. Mostly because it's a ridiculous amount of food for one person to eat, but it's a social eating festivity. It's not a fifteen-minute meal either. Korean BBQ takes a LONG time to eat. But that's when the talking and sharing and laughing happens. It happens in between pieces of meat being grilled and yelling at the waitress for more water and kimchee.

So tonight when I was eating my Korean BBQ alone, I missed the two of you and fellowshipping mixed with that smoky smell and yelling Korean waiters.

Love you and miss you both,

Big

Stop and smell the roses

These cute little flowers sprang up in the middle of my gravel driveway. I had forgotten something and stopped by my house after getting the car from the office and almost crushed them as I ran across the driveway into my house. I just had to grab my camera and take a picture.

It is often recommended to take the time to stop and smell the roses, but I don't think I do often enough. Even living here, in the most beautiful place I have ever seen, I don't often enough take the time to just stop and stare and praise God for His beautiful creativity. So many times when I'm driving I think I should stop and take a picture as I drive by a perfect picture. But I think a camera-captured image wouldn't do that moment any justice. So if you want to see the beauty I experience everyday, you'll just have to come make the trek out here!

This week was just really long. The weekend was full of...not sleeping. Monday and Tuesday, I left the house at 7:15 to get to school on time. Tuesday we had an earthquake at 1am that woke me up. Wednesday I had basketball practice after school and Thursday night I had my adult English conversation class to teach. And now it's Friday...Praise the Lord! I literally woke up every morning this week just asking God for enough strength and grace for the day. He provided. As exhausted as I have been this week, He provided.

I was blessed with incredible scenery this week. Autumn is upon us. And if you're from LA, you know, we don't really have seasons. I mean, we don't really have many trees, but we also don't have weather that deviates far from perfect (except this past week...I would've traded a couple degrees with you). But it's getting cooler and the sun is setting earlier and the leaves are starting to change color. And it's absolutely amazing.

I'm not lonely, but I'm definitely starting to feel alone. This week I just really missed having fellowship. I was blessed to be a part of a Skype Bible Study this week. Even though we were just working out logistics for our weekly time together, I was blessed to have people ask me how they could pray for me and to pray for me right then and there. I've never met these people before, and we live on completely opposite sides of this crazy island, but we are united by the same God, the same redemptive blood of Jesus Christ, and that means everything. And God provided.

In the midst of this crazy exhausting week full of wonder and splendor and blessings, this Psalm continually came to mind...

Praise the Lord! I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart,

in the company of the upright, in the congregation.

Great are the works of the Lord,

studied by all who delight in them.

Full of splendor and majesty are his work,

and his righteousness endures forever.

He has caused his wondrous works to be remembered;

the Lord is gracious and merciful.

He provides food for those who fear him;

he remembers his covenant forever.

He has shown his people the power of his works,

in giving them the inheritance of the nations.

The works of his hands are faithful and just;

all his precepts are trustworthy;

they are established forever and ever, to be performed with

faithfulness and uprightness.

He sent redemption to his people;

he has commanded his covenant forever.

Holy and awesome is his name!

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom;

all those who practice it have a good understanding.

His praise endures forever!

Psalm 111