Emotion Explosion and a Typhoon

The title says it all. Emotion explosion and a typhoon. I feel like I don’t even need to write a blog entry about it, but since I have yet another 7-hour day of sitting at my desk studying Japanese, I think I will.

First off, it was raining yesterday. Lots of rain. After I walked home for lunch, I had to change my pants and jacket (and I even had an umbrella). This is no ordinary rain. This is that sideways rain where, even if you have an umbrella, it’s rendered utterly useless because the rain doesn’t fall vertically like it should. Gravity is weaksauce compared to this sideways rain. So yeah, it was a rainy day. I usually like rainy days, but it made me feel…alone. Maybe because it made me not want to go out anywhere (not that I have many places aside from the homestore and supermarket to go to). So after work, I sat at home. I sat at my kitchen table and did NOTHING. I just sat there staring into space. And then burst into tears. I emotion explosioned ALL OVER my kitchen table. It was bad. But I pulled it together, made some ochazuke, took a shower, and then listened to some country music and lay on the floor. I went to my room for Bible time and emotion explosioned AGAIN!

The second emotion explosion was much better than the first. Because even though I was an emotional mess, God was still there, and I recognized Him. Even though I was emotional exploding all over the place and into Bible time, He was still there. In the midst of all the tears streaming down my face, I still felt His presence. And He held me. And I cried. He held me so close last night as I sobbed. In Isaiah, He promised me He would hold me in His righteous right hand; last night He didn’t back down on His promise. He promised He would be there to comfort me; last night He didn’t back down on His promise. He promised He would never leave me; last night He didn’t back down on His promise. I thanked Him for never changing and never going back on His promises. I thanked Him for all the people I had left back in the US, for all the relationships He blessed me with through the years. I thanked Him for being my Best Friend, not just God. I learned to praise Him in the storm.

But there is a second half to the title of this blog entry. There is a typhoon coming. I have never heard so much rain fall. Last night, I had one of those dreams where I was falling (some of you know what I’m talking about). I couldn’t go back to sleep after that. I listened to the rain falling outside my window. It sounded like my heater was on in the other room (but it wasn't), and buckets of water were being thrown at my window. It was insane! But around 5 am the rain stopped and now it’s just chilly and humid (didn’t know it could happen but that’s the current conditions). So apparently we won’t be having any fireworks tonight, but that’s okay. It’d probably be freezing anyways.

I was startled by my cell phone going off around 6:30 this morning only to find an encouraging email sent to my phone. I still have yet to figure out how to use the crazy thing, but it’s nice to be startled/surprised by things like that. God is still good and He is still God…emotion explosions and typhoons and all.